


Sweet Child(ren) of Mine

by Vashti (tvashti)



Series: My Father's Child [3]
Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: 2016 Twisted Shorts Ficathon, Adoption, Community: twistedshorts, Crossover, Crossovers & Fandom Fusions, Family, Gen, Gen Work, Real Family
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-07
Updated: 2016-09-07
Packaged: 2018-08-13 12:57:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7977556
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tvashti/pseuds/Vashti
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They all suffer from a complete lack of focus.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sweet Child(ren) of Mine

**Author's Note:**

> Post BTVS 5.16 "The Body" and pre-Season 7, post "The Avengers" and pre-everything-else.

"So you're a technicolor light show," Tony said with only slightly less sarcasm than either Buffy or Dawn might have expected considering his mechanical/sciency/engineering brain. Then again he and a bunch of superheroes (which included an alien-god/god-alien, and a man that was maybe two hundred pounds who turned into a green rage monster who maybe weighed a ton) had recently fought insecty-ish aliens. It was possible his weird-but-true meter had added a few colors.

"Try again, ladies."

Or not.

Buffy rolled her eyes. "Seriously? Of all the things I've told you, Dawn being the Key is what you fixate on?"

"Supers we've got, Shortcake--"

Bruce covered his face and groaned. "Oh, Tony, of all the random nicknames..."

Before Buffy could whip out an appropriate snappy response, Dawn held up her hands. "Look--"

"But--!" Buffy protested.

"There will be plenty of time for verbal evisceration. Obviously some of us are easily distracted by shiny things..." Dawn looked pointedly at Tony, but included Bruce in her glare. Who held up his hands as if to proclaim his innocence.

"If not Stark then it would have been you," Dawn said. "Admit it."

Bruce lowered his hands. "...maybe. But you have to admit that what you and Buffy are claiming isn't humanly possible."

Giving him a less than happy smile, Buffy said, "Guess that's why humans didn't do it." She turned to Dawn. "So what's the what? And don't pretend you don't have something up your sleeve."

"Who me?" Dawn said. "Of course I have something up my sleeve. They're just lucky it's nothing small and shiny."

"Uh, JARVIS," Tony said, "make sure to scan the tall one before she leaves the building."

"Very good, sir."

"Hey! I've given up my life of petty crime."

"Dawn. Focus!"

It took a moment of grumbling (and a promise to Bruce that they would fill him in on that particular chapter of their lives) before Dawn got herself on track again. Grouchy now, she said, "Look, all we have to do is a simple blood test on all three of us. Mom and Dad insisted when Bruce came calling that first time, right?"

Buffy and Bruce nodded.

"And it said that Buff's your bio-kid, not Hank and Joyce Summers', right?"

Bruce nodded.

"And you also remember when I was born, right?"

"And you're sure you're not the daddy," Tony threw in.

Bruce narrowed his eyes, but nodded again.

"Then if you're right there should be a close parental link between you and Buffy, but virtually no link between me and Buffy."

"But if we're right," Buffy said, "there will be a close genetic link between the three of us, with me and Dawn being nearly identical."

"So now you're saying she's a clone."

Buffy might have reached for Tony except Bruce caught her around the waist.

His hand still flew to the back of his head when someone hit him there. "Ow! What the-- Spysassin!"

Bruce sighed. "Thank you, Natasha."

Eyes bright with amusement, she said, "My pleasure, Doc."

"I thought you were gone?" Tony groused.

"It's never a good idea to go far when there's a Slayer in the room. Unless you're the one she's after. Then I suggest running far and running fast, and hoping something bigger than you distracts her."

Buffy, who had stopped struggling once Tony had been hit, looked up at Bruce. "I agree with Dawn. I thoroughly approve despite this clear violation of the SGA."

Turning bright red, Bruce released his daughter. "It's not...it's not like that."

"Uh huh," said Buffy. "Sure," came from Dawn.

Natasha approached the Slayer. She gave her a short, sharp nod. "Natasha Romanova. I've never met one of you in person."

"Uh, I've never met a spysassin before? But, hey, any lady friends of Bio-Dad's that can get this one to shut up for more than five minutes at a time is cool with me." She extended a hand. "Buffy Summers. Pleasure to meet you."

"She's not my lady friend," Bruce said, voice raised as Dawn practically vibrated around her sister and Natasha. "I mean, yes friend and yes a lady but not...not like that."

"Isn't he adorable when he gets all Giles like?" Dawn cooed.

Buffy and Natasha shared a pleased smile. "Not that I know who this Giles person is," Natasha said, "but it is adorable. Your...bio-dad..." her eyebrows went up in Bruce's direction, "is right however. I'm not his lady friend." Then in a voice she knew only Buffy could hear, she added, "At least not yet."

Turning on her heal, she offered her hand to Dawn. "Sounds like I'll be seeing you around. Natasha."

"Dawn." She took the proffered hand with a grin.

Natasha waved to the group and, once again, walked out of the room.

"But seriously...where did you come from?" Tony shouted after her. When there was no answer, narrowed his eyes and said, "JARVIS, where did Nat pop up from?"

"I'm not at liberty to say, sir."

"Not at... What is wrong with my life today?" Tony stalked off.

"Tony," Bruce called, "where are you going?"

"To find a tablet and have it out with my AI."

"Sir..."

"You took her side over mine!"

"Really, Sir, you did program self-preservation into my software."

Tony paused mid-step. "Good point. I'm not happy! But you make a good point." Turning on his heel, he stalked back to his friend. "All right. Let's draw some blood."

"Huh?" came from three faces of confusion.

"Look, if I can't fight my AI's flawless, genius-programmed logic and or dodge sneak attacks by spysassins, I can at least draw a little blood in the name of science. Let's get this test over with, kiddies. I've already gone thirty minutes without coffee."

And he stalked off again.

"Do we...follow him?" Buffy asked.

"What just happened?" Dawn asked.

Bruce shrugged. "I've learned to go with it. On the plus side, you may have already won?"

Dawn frowned. "My head hurts."

Smiling kindly, Bruce looped an arm around her waist, and another around Buffy's shoulders as he led the way to Tony's lab. "You get used to it.

"And...and you girls know that no matter what the tests say, you're still my...my daughters."

"I was hoping you'd feel that way," Buffy said. "It'll help when the Slayer bits sink in past the shock."

"About that..."

Fin[ite]

* * *

  
**Author's Notes:** This is the last story written for the August fic-a-day. Many thanks to the mods and reviewers from twistedshorts for helping to make this more than a random one-shot! :D


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